Words represent concepts. Once you open a
concept using a word, you must not change the word because the reader
may assume that a new word means a new concept. That will create
confusion.
For example, this is the opening sentence for a block of information: "Holding
training sessions in several remote sites would be better than bringing
people in from the field to the home office." These are the key
words: training sessions, several remote sites, bringing people
in from the field, and home office.You learned in high school English that,
to make the writing sound good, you should avoid repeating words.
That is true with words that carry no essential meaning. However,
don't use alternative words for the key words. Use them
over and over again without changing them. In business writing,
your objective is to communicate clearly, not write the great
American novel.
In the example sentence above, "remote
sites" are key words. See the confusion that results when you
change the term in the next sentences:
Holding training sessions in several remote sites would be better than bringing people in from the field to the home office. A distance learning location would have facilities that could enhance the training. One way to ensure that our training is consistent is to have regional training locations with the same instructors going from region to region to do the training.
The reader is left wondering whether "remote
sites," "distance learning location," and "regional training locations"
are the same thing. Is the writer introducing two or three different
options? Each seems to be opening a new concept. Once
the writer settled on "remote sites," she should have locked in
that term, as in this example:
Holding training sessions in several remote sites would be better than bringing people in from the field to the home office. These sites would have facilities that could enhance the training. One way to ensure that our training is consistent is to have a remote site in each region with
the same instructors going from region to region to do the training.
Key words in the statement of contents
The primary key words are in the statement of contents at the beginning of the e‑mail.
Example:
Statement of contents: "A focus on telemarketing would provide four
benefits to our company: . . . ."
Key words: "telemarketing, benefits."
Do not change those words. Use them consistently throughout your
e‑mail. Don't change them to "phone services," "marketing
by phone," "advantages," "features," or any other synonym.
Main point key words
The main points have
their own sets of key words. In the example that follows, the main
points are listed in the statement of contents after the colon. In this
example, the key words for the first main point are in red, the
second main point in green, the third main point in blue, and the
last main point are in magenta.
Example:
Statement of contents: "A focus on telemarketing would provide four
benefits to our company: a decrease in direct
mail costs, more openings
to cross-sell to customers, opportunities
to gather market research data, and
promotion of the image of the personal touch
we say we provide."
Question or guideline key words
If you are answering questions contained in the request for a proposal,
audit guidelines, or other instructions for your responses, the
words in the questions or guidelines should become key words.
Usually, begin your response by repeating the question or guideline.
If you do not repeat the entire question or guideline, repeat as
much of the question or guideline as necessary. In any event, always
use the requester's words in your responses. They become the key
words.
Example: The question
in the request was, "How many hours were spent completing the project
design?" In the following response, the writer included the question,
verbatim, and used the key words in the response:
"Question 4: How many hours were
spent completing the project design?
"Answer: We spent 74 hours completing
the project design."
Choose key words that
are meaningful to the reader. Always use the reader's words. Never
change them to a set of synonyms.
Use key words to identify problems in unity and clarity.
The key words unify and clarify your writing. They unify your writing by letting the reader know how the information fits together. Each time you repeat a key term, the reader is able to fit the contents into the overall picture that has the key term as its focus. That clarifies the writing because the reader is able to fit the pieces of your puzzle together as you present them.
You can use the key words to identify problems in unity and clarity. If the key words don't appear consistently throughout the explanation, that is a signal that the writing is not unified, making it unclear.
Check the opening sentence and the closing sentence. Normally, you should see the key words in both sentences, or at least in the sentences adjoining them. If you don't see the key words, look at the writing to see why the focus has changed.
Example
To see an example of a report that confuses the key words and a revision that improves it, click on the "Example" button below. The information will appear in a new window. Close the new window when you're finished looking at the examples.